Sexual problems
The following sexual problems may occur if you use drugs with increasing frequency and for a long time during sex.
Inability to have sex without drugs
Sex can go on for hours to days under the influence of drugs. Sex becomes prolonged and intense and can push you beyond your usual limits. It is important to realise that this sexual experience is not reality. Alternate party & play with sober sex to avoid becoming dependent on drugs to get aroused.
Keep sex under the influence special; plan it deliberately, preferably no more than once a month/six weeks.
Freaky sex
The combination of prolonged sex, lots of porn, and chems can lead to pornographic sex fantasies and practices that you may consider highly questionable while sober. Is it a deep-rooted fantasy, or is it because of the drugs? Continuing drugs longer seems to increase the likelihood that you will choose sex or porn, which you later feel disgust, regret or guilt about. Tina users, in particular, report obsessively creating their “own porn film” involving transgressive sexual practices.
Set a time limit for yourself in advance. For example, limit yourself to staying up for a maximum of one night. Seek help from a sex therapist if the memories continue to haunt you or you find it difficult to face your actions.
STI transmission
Condoms are often not used during sex under the influence. Unprotected sex feels more natural, arousing and exciting. This puts you at a high risk of contracting an STI, especially if you attend large and/or anonymous sex parties or have many alternating sexual contacts.
Discuss your HIV status or PrEP use before a date. Be aware that not everyone claiming to use PrEP is taking it. For more tips on discussing HIV and STIs, check how to sleaze without aftermath.
Porn, chatting and dating apps
Under the influence of chems, all sense of time falls away, and you can spend hours watching porn, chatting or using dating apps. Even during the comedown, porn and dating apps can evoke a strong desire to use again.
Flip the switch and prevent further exhaustion. During the comedown, cut yourself off from sexual stimuli as much as possible and focus on physical and mental recovery: eat, drink and sleep.
Transgressive behaviour
Sex under the influence often pushes the limits and can cloud agreements around sexual roles, fantasies and boundaries. Especially during large, multi-day, and often anonymous sex parties. It is crucial to remember that abuse under the influence of drugs is never “part of the game”; not for yourself and not for others. Unfortunately, people are sometimes sexually abused under the influence of drugs. For example, during a GHB/GBL overdose—the G-sleep (link to GHB)—sex may continue while you or the other person is unconscious.
If this has happened to you, do not bottle it up; talk about it with friends or caregivers. Click here for more info on sex & consent.
Erectile dysfunction
The use of erectile dysfunction medication is almost standard practice during chemsex. The more chems you use and the longer you use them, the less Kamagra or Androskat will work. This is especially true of stimulants (link to uppers). Prolonged use reduces the ability to have an erection and ejaculate.
To learn more about combining drugs with erectile dysfunction medication, see: prevent permanent damage.